


Fire Nation Training

by constellayetion



Series: Culture Shock [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Child Abuse, Cultural norms, Culture exploration, Gen, Light Angst, M/M, Mentions of self-harm, Ozai's A+ Parenting, Slight Canon Divergence, The Fire Nation's A+ Training Regiment, mentions of suicidal ideation, set between The Firebending Masters and The Boiling Rock Part 1, which is accidental and one-time but still
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:41:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24515554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/constellayetion/pseuds/constellayetion
Summary: The Fire Nation has some weird cultural norms. When Zuko gets added to the group, they find a fun role for him to play. Fire Nation Fact Checker!(Basically meaning, I wanted to explore the conversations the gaang would have about their separate societies, traditions, and worldviews)Chapter One: The Gaang wonders, what does a Training Accident even mean? And why do so many Fire Nation recruits seem to have the mark of one?Chapter Two: Sokka worries about what training methods Zuko will use with Aang and finding out the Fire Nation's way of 'training' the previous night.He didn't realize what kind of training Zuko was referring to though, and actual discipline is very different than he thought.Chapter Three: Zuko reflects on what Aang said. Control...versus intent... How does one even not have ill intent?Chapter Four: Zuko teaches Aang the new trick he learned: How to NOT burn things.Chapter Five: Sokka sees Zuko practicing his new skill. He does not react...well.
Relationships: Zuko & Aang, Zuko & Sokka, Zuko & The Gaang, eventual Sokka/Zuko - Relationship, in much later parts of this series
Series: Culture Shock [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1775524
Comments: 209
Kudos: 3403
Collections: Koi’s atla fic recs





	1. Training Accidents

**Author's Note:**

> TW in end notes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW in end notes!

Zuko had only been working with the group for two days. He had been keeping to himself, other than that one weird time at the Sun Warrior Temple, but hadn’t started official training yet and was trying to keep his head down. 

Somehow, he had ended up still eating with the rest of the group, even after the other three kids the Avatar had strangely collected had run off to...heavens knows where. The last time Zuko had seen them was last night. The one in a wheelchair had been pulling himself through midair with some kind of pulley system while the earthbender one threw rocks off a cliff. For some reason. The small one that Zuko assumed was a child also cheered everytime they heard a rock hit something and called out a seemingly random number. So, Zuko really didn’t want to mess with...whatever that was. 

He had assumed that they would just leave him to his own devices in terms of food and...being alive but the first night the blind girl had literally grabbed him by the collar (which she shouldn’t even be able to reach?) and pulled him to their favorite pavilion, shoving a bowl in his hands. After which, it had just become commonplace for them all to eat together. In a weird, tense mostly-silence but still together. Zuko had spent the rest of his time wandering, trying to stay out of everyone else’s way. By now he knew plenty of hideyholes and great places to practice. Or talk to himself. Or just...scream. 

He knew dusk was starting, from where he observed it in one of the temple’s terraces and had started to head back to the group. Even though he definitely could provide for himself, probably, it was easier being able to share stores with the others. And, even though he wouldn’t admit it, not eating alone was...nice. 

But, this time as he approaches, he hears one topic come up that he knows he’ll get dragged into. He thinks about leaving, but remembers Sokka calling meals ‘mandated bonding time’ and decides he does not want to know the punishment for skipping. 

Sokka’s voice floats easily through the airy temple, “You know, you’d think the Fire Nation would be better at not burning their recruits. I mean, I swear I’ve seen at least three of them that have scars that could almost rival... you know.” 

Then Katara’s voice, saying, “Yeah, I could swear even when I was working with Pakku, I had never heard of so many ‘training accidents’ and I literally threw people into ice walls. And the ocean. But, maybe I can rack up a few more if Zuko doesn’t learn a different technique than the one his teachers obviously used.” Then he hears her laughing. And no one else laughing. And then he hears her stop laughing and call the rest of them humorless. 

Even though Katara just casually mentioned maiming him, again, Zuko can feel some satisfaction at her failed attempts to be funny. The more he sees of them, the more he realizes he isn’t the only awkward teenager there. 

Of course, this is also the moment he chooses to actively walk into a conversation talking about disfiguring scars and the nature of his genocidal people. 

“I wonder what kind of training they’re using then. I mean, what kind of accident would cause—,” Aang muses, cutting himself off and eyes widening to match Momo as Zuko walks in.

The group avoids his eyes, with only Katara managing to look like she wasn’t possessed while doing so. 

At least, until, “Hey, Sparky, you want to tell us why so many of your people seem to not get through training without giving someone permanent skin damage?” Toph calls over to him. 

“Toph!” Katara admonishes, “You can’t—”

“What? He would know why there are so many so-called ‘training accidents’”

Aang leans over to whisper in her ear, “He has... his own training accident. Across his face.”

Zuko doesn’t know if he should pretend to not hear that. Tact also seems to be a rarity in this group. 

“Oh.” Toph says. “Sorry”

“It’s fine.” None of them speak, so he actually walks over to sit at a column near them all. He tries to not intrude on their circle near the fire. 

They listen to crackling and it rises, slowly following his own breath, but subtly enough the rest of the group doesn’t notice. Zuko hopes. They all finish their food in silence, even Zuko eating after Aang sheepishly fills a bowl, quickly bends the stew back into the bowl after he almost spills all of it in his rush, and hands it to him.

Katara starts gathering up the bowls until Zuko takes them from her, listening to Sokka grumble as his sister forces him to join the firebender and the two of them head to the fountain to wash up. By the time the last dish was scrubbed and the two settled back at the fire he had made his decision.

“They’re not training accidents.”

All ears prick up as he starts talking, even as the owners aggressively attempt to remain blasé. 

“Firebenders learn breathing and control before they can even walk. They meditate for hours a day before they can even read. What makes you think one of us would  _ ever  _ have a training accident? Let alone one that would actually harm, or spirits forbid  _ burn  _ someone?”

Katara offers, “Well, Aang had a training—”

“Well Aang isn’t a firebender is he?” Zuko snaps. 

“And, no offense Sparky, most of us aren’t that surprised that the Fire Nation wouldn’t be adverse to burning people.” Toph points at her feet, reminding him of...

“Sorry. It’s just… not the same with firebending. Our accidents aren’t… throwing a rock too close during sparing or sneezing too loud and flying in the air or pouring snow on someone’s head…”

Katara glares at him. 

Sokka looks between the two before whispering, “To be fair Katara, that did happen...many times.” She confirms this by turning her icy glare on him instead. 

“They told me stories… when I was growing up. You know them by heart before you even start school so you can truly understand how dangerous fire can be. Toddlers who breath sparks and burn down their own nursery. With themselves inside. Adolescent girls’ in the colonies who burn off presumptuous, earth bending boys’ faces for pulling on their pigtails. Idiotics teenagers who grab a friend too hard in an argument and leave a permanent handprint seared into their skin. And those are only ones in the last few hundred years, poor education, presumed non-benders, or untrained mixed children. The older ones, from adults who didn’t have enough control…”

Zuko trails off. “It’s kind of a long story. Well, all of them are kind of long stories.” 

He looks up at the group, seeing them all leaning in, and then realizing…

“C’mon, Sparky, you can’t leave it at that” Toph berates.

Sokka adds, “This is the one time you appear to have a functioning speech pattern and you give up? Unacceptable.” 

And Aang… While Aang was extremely wary of the previous topic, all of his hestience disappeared as soon as Zuko said the word ‘story’. When he realized the older boy wasn’t going to continue, jumps up and all but shoves Zuko towards the campfire, who barely caught himself at the edge before he would fall in as Aang proclaims, “We  _ LOVE  _ story time here we would love to hear a story can you believe this Katara an actual historic story from the actual Fire Nation I haven’t heard one of these since Kuzon oof—”

Aang tosses aside a small rock as Toph mutters an excuse to Katara about training and reflexes. 

“C’mon Zukes, we would love for you to tell us some Fiery Fairy Tales, courtesy of the Crown Prince himself,” Sokka says, pulling him to a sitting position next to him, even as Katara ‘hmph’s from across the campfire and the rock Aang tossed away conveniently finds its way towards Toph’s head. 

Zuko looks into the flames in front of him, their crackling providing the background for the stories that had long been ground into the back of his brain. And he begins. 

“Once, there was a woman, a good-bender, sparring with her instructors. She was from a noble family, had years of training, but was too sure of herself. People said she had lost her True Inner Fire as she lost any sense of respect in her bending. It was loose, but her masters called it her ‘raw power’. They didn’t see that it was  _ just _ raw. Unpredictable. She used her inner turmoil to fuel her bending and eventually...it would be her downfall. Her emotions controlled the fire, instead of guiding it and that’s what her Fire learned to feed on. She would leave training sessions with her hair singed, her face blushing, and her skin always streaked with ashes. 

One day, she was sparring, an airbender who kept evading her blows. Taunting her. Her instructors had faith in her ability to grow from this challenge, this new style of fighting. He made her more and more frustrated and she got vicious, feeding more and more of herself to her Inner Fire until... she cracked. The spectators all felt the wave of heat, flinching from the sidelines and had to wait. Those that looked at her for too long had dark spots burnt into her vision. Eventually, the light dimmed and they were able to look at what had happened. They expected to see the airbender, cowed and the challenge completed but that’s not what they saw.

Her opponent stood there, completely undamaged. 

And she wasn't as lucky. Everyone watched as her jaw slacked and steam poured out. Her instructors thought she had finally mastered Breath of Fire but she hadn’t. Instead, green fluid dripped out of her nose, down, into and out of her open mouth, then out of her ears, then her eyes. Her innards had come leaking out of her, completely liquified and still boiling until the only thing left was her skin and skull. Her Inner Fire had totally consumed her.”

Zuko looked around the fire, wondering if he should feel bad as they all looked...exactly as he did when he heard the story for the first time. Well, no stopping now, he figures. He launched into the next one. 

“Once, a firebender was traveling through the Langali Desert.” 

“The Langali Desert...” Sokka asks, softly, maybe knowing where this was heading, “isn’t that what we call…”

“The Sand Glass Dunes.” Zuko nods, “This story is the reason for that.”

“The Firebender was advised by the spirits to prepare well for his journey and stick to his group. But he was proud, unflinchingly confident in his abilities and disregarded them. He thought it couldn’t be more than a three day journey and packed suitability. He traveled at the back of the group, often wandering off to look at the sights, always having faith that he could find his way back. But, the weather did not favor him or his impudence. 

The dust stormed for seven days. He easily got lost, separated from his group, and his supplies ran out before the winds stopped. He grew hungry, tired, and that quickly turned into delirium. He didn’t know where he was, how to get out, or what was a threat. So, he assumed everything was. Attempting to attack everything as his own power died in the darkness of the storm. He lost control. As soon as the sun’s rays hit him again after days of deprivation and confusion, he let it radiate all the way through him and then, it radiated all the way through the entire desert, attacking the nature that had made him lose his mind. Of course, there was nothing to burn but—” 

“--there was plenty to melt.” Toph interrupted. 

Sokka looked at Toph, her wide eyes staring into the fire. Probably realizing the power held in the heat pressing against her face. Maybe, realizing for the first time how lucky they were it was contained. Or how easily it could stop being contained.

“Exactly. But, it wasn’t just the sand around him. It was the entire desert. 

His fellow travelers had also been trapped in the storm and felt the sand start to heat, then, bubble and then, as they tried to run, the feet sunk into the liquified glass, hissing as it over took skin and slowly melted together. That one slip up, one separation, claimed the lives of the bender, his entire traveling party, and everyone else who was unfortunate enough to be in the desert at the time, boiling them alive and then encasing their bodies in newly made glass, like flies in amber.

So, no… we do not lose control in the Fire Nation.”

“But, I’ve seen it happen,” Katara says, “I’ve seen you do it, along with others.”

“Well, we don’t lose control without knowing what we’re doing.” Zuko snaps. He calms himself before he continues, not wanted to isolate himself, even if this subject (this wrong assumption carefully grown by his forefathers) would serve to further villanize his people. “We know what we’re doing. And we choose it. It’s a convenient excuse. ‘I just lost control.’ ‘I didn’t mean to hurt him’. ‘I didn’t mean to burn that village down’. ‘We’re angry people, it’s best not to see what makes us to angry to control ourselves’. It’s a better image for war to all seem like we don’t mean it when we let off some steam.”

Sokka cackles at that, nervous energy making him seem half maniacal “Fire Nation? Blowing off Steam? Sorry, sorry, thought that was a joke. Sorry! Also, I may have needed a slight relief. I don’t think you’ve scared me so bad since you told us you wanted to join us. The first time.”

Zuko manages a small smile at that. Toph also deciding to chuckle, all of them trying to alleviate any of the heavy subject matter. 

Zuko sighs. “I even admit, before, before I knew what I was doing, the effect it has...when you’re connected to your element it is so easy to tap into it, let yourself affect the world around you. I would be angry and flames would take over my hands, candles would move with my breath, sparks would fly from my mouth, and you make it seem like it’s out of control, like it’s not your choice. But, I promise you it is. It always is.”

“I’ve only had a few times that I actually lost control. The first time, I was, uh, probably two. Or three. I don’t really remember it but my cousin would tell me about it. I was in the nursery, at the, in the Fire Nation. And there was this girl, this other baby there. Some visiting daughter of some noble who had been left to be babysat. And apparently I uh...really liked the girl.”

“Awwww,” Aang and Toph coo even as Sokka sputters over the idea of baby zuko. Katara looks even more mortified at the thought imagining baby zuko with  _ feelings _ . 

“Not so much of an ‘aw’ moment,” Zuko adds, even if there was a faint blush for him to hide. “I liked her so much and apparently kept looking at her. And one day, I thought she wasn’t coming and got super upset and um, from what I’ve been told, I was a bit of a sad baby,” Zuko talks over Sokka’s snort, “But she was just late. I was already crying and all and then she came in and I saw her and smiled harder than my nursemaids had ever seen me smile before. She immediately broke out in sunburns, just all, blistered skin and…yeah.”

Zuko wanted to sink into the ground now. “So yeah, uh, after that you learn to sort of, try not to, do that or be like that, since you can accidentally cause someone skin damage as a baby by liking them.” 

Spirits, he wished he could learn how to stop talking. Or that someone else would learn how to stop not talking. This silence was extremely— 

“Oh, I get it!” Zuko does not like the look of Sokka’s current grin, “So, that’s why Sir Jerks A Lot refuses to smile around all of us. Or anyone. He’s afraid if we see those pearly whites we will  _ literally  _ get second degree burns.”

“Yeah, sorry to tell ya Sparky, as weird of a story that one was it actually is kinda cute. I mean, once I had a crush on a girl and didn’t know what to do about it and literally dropped her in a hole every time I saw her.” Toph says, surprising Zuko. 

“I feel like that’s less bad than burning skin.” Sokka argues. 

“The girl broke her leg in three places.” Toph adds. Sokka immediately shuts his mouth. “And now, I don’t drop anyone in holes except on purpose! C’mon, Sparky, eventually you’re gonna have to loosen up a little.” She punches him in the arm as she says that and Zuko isn’t sure if it is meant to be comforting or a threat. 

Zuko dares to ask, curious about her...anecdote. “I’ve never, uh, heard so much about other benders and...you know…”

“Control issues?” Toph raises an eyebrow, “I mean, I had them because I was barely allowed to bend until I got lost in a cave. Even with the girl, my parents assumed  _ she  _ was the earthbender and just had weird self-destructive tendencies for a toddler. Or really liked worms. It was a more, separation from the element thing.”

“Katara has it when she gets really emotional. I mean it’s usually not...you know, scar heavy but I’ve almost gotten frostbite a few times by her accidentally anger snowbanks.” 

Aang adds, “I have issues all the time! The monks emphasize  _ intent  _ over  _ control _ . There’s no issue with losing control if you don’t have ill intent!” He pauses. “At least...not with air...I mean, I’ve accidentally pushed a few people off cliffs when I was a kid but that doesn’t cause much damage when the person can just fly up again and push you off in return!” 

Zuko knew that other benders had control issues, they had to, but he never heard people talk about it so casually. Without even a sense of guilt, just...understanding. Even though, now, in the Fire Nation, people didn’t feel as much shame over ‘losing control’. 

“There used to be a time. During Azulon’s time, it was when Uncle Iroh and my fa— Fire Lord Ozai were growing up, it would be shameful to ever admit that you had lost control of your fire. Let alone, harmed anyone, yourself or others with it. That changed when it became a convenient...excuse. That’s what Fire Lord Azulon used to say. A good way of excusing up burn marks. He actually popularized what would become known as a “training accident”.” 

Zuko actually laughs at that phrase, even if it accompanied an ache in his stomach. Gruesome as it was, it was still funny to him in a way Iroh always disapproved of. Funny,  _ had  _ to be funny, even as he pretended not to notice Toph being quieter than she ever was, Katara’s mouth pressed into a firm line, or Sokka knocking shoulders with him. Dense as he could be, Zuko has a growing suspicion that the boy used his apparent lack of thinking to cover his actual talent for knowing when a gentle touch was needed. 

“Hey dude,” Sokka says, “Not that it’s not great to see you laughing and all, but I don’t think the rest of us really understand the joke.” 

“Oh, um. Mai, the um, I think you met her in Ba Sing Sei, she’s the uh...knives and no voice inflection?” The rest of the group nods, “It’s an Fire Nation inside joke, though it has a...a bit of a morbid sense of humor. The joke is...that is how they train you in the Fire Nation. You speak out of turn, obviously you need to get trained properly. So, it’s a training accident.”

If only Toph could regain the habit of dropping people into holes. Zuko would rather that than the crickets that faced him now. 

Aang pipes up first, “Well, I think that’s the least funny joke I’ve ever heard.” 

Zuko pauses. Seeing an opportunity. 

“Well, then obviously I haven’t told enough yet.” Zuko replies.

He readies himself to excuse himself for the night and then...Toph is laughing, loud and obnoxious with Sokka and Aang joining her just as quickly. Even, Katara cracks a non-murderous grin. Zuko relaxs, glad to see there might be some recovery from a conversation he was sure would get him banned from the ‘mandated bonding time’. 

Sokka smiles, “Well, glad to see we now have one additional thing to keep you around for…”

“Um…” Zuko has no idea what to say to that, “Leverage?”

“Well, that too. But, more importantly,” he smiles, deviously, “Now we have our own, home-grown Fire Nation Fact Check.”

Aang gasps with excitement and Zuko tries to fend the two of them off as they ask anything from if fire-flakes were made from actual fire to whether or not Ozai issued him a math test. Zuko fends, saying he’s not an on-call cultural resource, and finally gets them to get off him.

And then Toph promptly claps him on the back hard enough to knock him over to almost throw him into the fire. Again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Descriptions of some light gore/violence. Basically, Zuko talks about what happens when firebenders lose control and describes people getting hurt. 
> 
> This is my first work that I've published so thank you all for reading! Looking forward to more explorations of how the kids might hit some culture shock or misunderstandings. :) Totally open to suggestions too! 
> 
> Also, follow me on Tumblr! (screenname also constallayetions)


	2. Discipline

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sokka worries about what training methods Zuko will use with Aang and finding out the Fire Nation's way of 'training' the previous night.  
> He didn't realize what kind of training Zuko was referring to though, and actual discipline is very different than he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW at bottom!

Sokka is watching Zuko. 

Sokka had been doing this for...a while, wondering the best way to broach a...sensitive subject. With a sensitive subject. 

Said subject was sitting, looking characteristically brood-y, next to the Air Temple’s cliffs. On the edge of a couple-thousand foot high chasm. That would easily eat him for breakfast and spit him out as a colorful lump of firebender shaped stupidity. 

So, with the nature of the scenery, Sokka had been stuck antagonizing on which way of talking to the angst-ridden prince was the least likely to incorporate the cliff and Zuko’s nature of avoiding serious subjects. 

Taking a leaf from Toph’s tree, Sokka decides to be direct. 

“So, the Fire Nation uses burns as a means to train people,” Sokka says, as he plunks down on the ledge next to Zuko, placing a good natured slap on firebender’s back that coincidentally stayed on the bottom of his neck to keep the idiot from accidentally (or purposefully, Sokka still doesn’t know how impulsive Zuko is) from jumping off the cliff. 

“What?! Why would you— Where did you get that from?” Zuko snaps, angrily moving to stand but Sokka quickly pulls him back down. He  _ knew  _ that hand would come in handy. Haha. Still got it. 

“You did, remember? I’m just saying, Katara probably won’t like it if you start making Aang’s face match yours just because his hot squats aren’t low enough.”

Zuko stares at him. 

“I’m just warning ya.” 

His hand still has a place on Zuko’s back and Sokka isn’t sure if this interaction is as awkward as it is because of that...or all of the other stuff. 

“I would never… I would never say that, let along imply that…” Zuko half-stammers.  _ Oh, great, it’s the other stuff.  _

“Zoodles. Those stories you told us the other night… to explain the ‘training accident’?” Sokka turns towards him, finally deciding to release the other boy - _ Thank the gods, Sokka act normal-  _ only for Zuko to turn towards him and Sokka instinctively mirrors the gesture. Which ends up with their knees knocking together and Sokka’s hands resting on Zuko’s knees which somehow he doesn’t notice? Or seem to mind?  _ Fuck _ , Sokka cajoles himself for his seeming lack of control over his own body as he can’t to see to move himself, again, without probably making the whole thing massively more awkward. 

He could be in control of this, he could do this...Sokka style. He drops the blunt pretense, never being that big a fan of ‘tough love’. Or ‘Toph love’. 

“Look,” Sokka starts, “I’ve seen a lot of teachers in my time. A lot of really great and really not so great bending and non-bending teachers. And, I get it, I really do. I know that you didn’t have it easy, growing up in the ‘we baptize children in literal fire and teach them to eat each other for brownie points’ Nation.”

Sokka takes a deep breath, preparing to make the proposition he came here for, that he had spent most of the night thinking about, “You may not have or have had that many people out here to do a ‘normalcy check’ for you. To tell you what’s normal. How you should be treated. So, I’m here, offering my services.” 

Zuko’s mouth falls open. And closes. And opens again. This goes on for...an amount of time, until, finally, he decides to cross his arms and pout. Or glare, whichever one he decides to call it. 

While Zuko may think this is the end of the conversation, Sokka notices that he makes no move to end it. Or move either of them from their semi-close position. Or making another move towards that Tui-forsaken cliff edge.

Sokka will take a win where he can get one. Sokka style: One. Fire Nation Style: Probably a lot more, but still a win.

“Burning people while training them. Not normal. Not okay. Burning people for your own amusement, whims, or feeling of power. Not normal. Not okay.”

“I wouldn’t—”

Sokka cuts the other boy off, easily, before that could go any further, “I don’t think  _ you _ would. I just threw that one in for free, call it a first-timers’ discount.” He winks, laughing, glad to see Zuko’s eyes soften. Sokka was also glad Zuko didn’t seem to be paying attention to notice how weak of an attempt at humor it was. Or how careful he was being since so much of Zuko’s past was still a big unknown. As Gran-Gran said, “Tread lightly until you know how thick the ice is.” Which, was probably meant literally but...still applied. 

Sokka adds, “I just wanted to make sure you knew.” 

“Thank you.” Zuko examines the rafters above him. Sokka leans back, letting the other boy process. 

In the silence, the only sound was the two of them thinking. Or overthinking. Or maybe just Sokka overthinking and it sounded  _ very loud  _ to him. He knew that Zuko would never burn someone for his own satisfaction. He  _ knew  _ that as much as he knew that the grass was green, the south was cold, and water was wet. It was a  _ fact _ . He hadn’t known it when he met him, had known the opposite actually, hadn’t known it on Kyoshi Island, hadn’t known it running from pirates. He didn’t know when he started to know it. Maybe at the abbey. Maybe in the ghost town in the Earth Kingdom. Maybe half-alive in the North Pole…

Zuko breaks first.

“I wouldn’t have burnt Aang.” Zuko starts and Sokka raises an eyebrow. “Number one, in terms of the few things I do know about this group, one of them is that Katara, you, or Toph would not hesitate to kill me if I even talked too loud at Aang, let alone hurt him.” 

“Hey we wouldn’t  _ kill  _ you, lightly maim,  _ maybe _ .” 

Zuko snorted, then went back to his same “brood” as Sokka used to call it, which he now sees...isn’t quite just that...but— 

“Number two, I wouldn’t… I just wouldn’t do that…”

Another fact that Sokka doesn’t question. Not a bit. 

“Number three, my scar isn’t from training. Not fire bending training. It’s um… It’s a different kind of training. That’s the joke.”

“Haha. So funny. Stop, my stomach hurts. ” 

“Hey, you asked.”

“Yeah, well, I still don’t get it.”

“You learn a lot growing up. How many of your survival skills actually have to do with how well you fight?”

Sokka can feel his smile slide off his face at that one. Zuko moves on before he can even think about answering.

“Number four, in terms of actually training, that’s not how they trained us. They didn’t burn us.”

“Fire nation...not using fire…?

“No, it’s um...burns scar. Pretty bad, you know? I mean you can tell from, um, I’m a great example.” Zuko stops speaking as Sokka laughs, surprising himself and Zuko seems to relax a little. “Yeah. Plus, most firebenders have some higher threshold to burns and fire, so it takes a lot more heat and such to cause actual harm.”

But...if Zuko’s scar was already darker than any Sokka had seen before, in  _ addition  _ to Zuko’s ‘tolerance’ than how bad—?

“And it- they- they wouldn’t want to leave marks!” Zuko is rambling again  _ shit _ “it doesn’t, um, burns stay? And then you can’t fight for...longer? You don’t use permanent damage to teach bending moves.” 

“Would it be too hopeful to assume they used patience and positive enforcement?”

“They used ice.” 

“Oh.” Sokka is going to be compassionate and understanding and  _ tread lightly _ , even if he really doesn’t understand what’s so bad about ice, yeah it can be cold but he grew up in it and it could be really cold but some numb toes weren't enough to cause the face Zuko was currently making, but fine, he can tread lightly. “Right on, yeah, the cold sucks, I would know—”

“No, no, it’s not like that it’s… Firebenders create their own element. See” Zuko creates a flame, a small one balancing at the top of one finger to illustrate his point. “They don’t bend something external, like the other ones. We call it the Inner Flame, or Inner Spark depending on who you talk to. It keeps us warm, keeps us alive, and if that is messed with... It can really fuck you up.”

Zuko extinguishes the fire in a puff of smoke and pulls his knees into his chest. Numbly, Sokka feels his hands sliding to the ground and hitting dirt. He had never heard Zuko swear before. 

“Umm...and ice...ice does that?” Before Zuko could go down any Zuko-paths, Sokka interrupts, “I’m just trying to understand here! Not trying to...anything else!”

Zuko sighs and rests his chin on his knee. “Yeah, ice does that. Or really any cold. It’s actually called ‘separation from the element’ in terms of, I guess, medical stuff. So when they do it, it...it’s—” Sokka suddenly notices him fiddling with the edge of his sleeve, just barely falling over his wrist, “it’s much more effective than bruises or burns or anything… it cuts down, like it goes all the way to your soul.” 

Zuko shudders, the same way he would see kids in the South Pole who went out without coats shudder and Sokka’s throat suddenly hurts. He must be getting sick.

“So, what did they do?”

“It depended on the teacher.”

“Hmm.” Sokka looks at him. Hoping...for anything more. Hoping to not have to ask. He tilts his head and... Whoops, wrong move— 

“Hey, I’m not trying to make a sob story or a tragic backstory, I’m really not—” Zuko suddenly stands up, pacing, and tripping over his own sentences.  _ Fuck _ . 

“I know.”

“You came to talk to me, you came to ask me about—”

“I know, man.” 

“And  _ imply  _ and  _ accuse  _ me that I would burn a twelve year old!”

“Hey, history dictates.”

“And then offer to— to—”

“Hey,” Sokka grabs as Zuko was currently gesticulating wildly next to the cliff that, oh so surprisingly, hadn’t moved. Jerkbender seemed all too eager to test his tried and true rotten luck with gravity. And then Sokka’s hand was resting on him, where his neck met his shoulder and his other hand was on his bicep and Zuko’s hands were caught between them, brushing against Sokka’s own chest. And Zuko had stopped talking. And pacing. And doing anything else and Sokka’s heart felt like it could move back out of his stomach, where it had lodged when he first realized what Zuko thought that he thought. And Sokka’s hands still felt like they were on fire, melting from the inside like in Zuko’s stories and he decided he officially needed Katara to look him over later. 

“I’m sorry,” Sokka says. At least that manages to get Zuko to stop looking at him like he was going to shove him off the cliff. And like he would let him. “I didn’t know. I don’t know you that well. But I would like to.”

As Zuko meets Sokka’s eyes again, looking more  _ tired  _ than anything which  _ fuck _ makes Sokka understand what Zuko said about cutting all the way down to your soul. 

Sokka continues, “I’m not trying to shame you. I think you have plenty of people in your life to do that for you. I’m just trying to...understand. Get some Fire Nation anthropology if you will.”

“Anthropology...”

“Hey, I met a professor once who thought I would be very good at it. I do have a very vested interest in history, if you would know.”

“Hmm”

“And the Fire Nation.”

“I don’t think you have a choice in that one.”

“And their customs.”

“Know the enemy”

“And their prince. And knowing why he is the way he is.”

Zuko fails to retort to that one. Sokka claims the victory and keeps talking, “But, from what I know so far, the prince’s vicinity to this cliff and past tendencies is making my heart pound hard enough I’m afraid Toph will hear it in her sleep and come try to rescue me,” Sokka says, hooking an arm around Zuko’s and leading the guy further back from the ledge, stopping at a nice sunny spot. In the sun. That the sun-guy might enjoy. 

Sokka sits back down. Zuko joins him, tilting his chin up to catch the sun’s rays as Sokka gives himself an internal high-five.

Now, to really work the Water Tribe magic. If there is one thing Sokka has learned, from the art of fishing, hunting, and mediating between the literal children he has to hang out with everyday, is that patience will lead to everything desired being offered...eventually. People will do a lot to fill a silence. Even if he wants to interrogate Zuko until he spills all of the bad things that had been indoctrinated into him so that Sokka can finally work on getting him to un-indoctrinate some of those things, he can wait. Sokka is sure he will talk eventually. 

And, eventually, he does. 

“Some of my teachers were actually pretty nice. When I was a lot younger especially. They were strict, royal tutors are like that but not...whatever. Then, I got older, teachers had to be better which equated to harsher.”

Zuko’s approach was a marked difference from his storytelling from the previous night. Now, Sokka realized how ancient that folklore must have been, as Zuko clearly had been carrying on the drama that others’ had imbued into the words. And knew it word for word from constant repetitions. Now, he talked with an indifference, as if he was reciting a grocery list, with the only hint at painful moments being a long, still pause. It was eerily similar to how Azula talked about her plans, completely detached. 

“First, it was just really cold water.”

“Like, how you spray a cat.”

“Exactly how you spray a cat.”

“Huh.” Sokka tried to muster up an image of Zuko getting sprayed from a fountain, then hissing at his teacher. He snorts at the thought. 

“So, that was just, you do something wrong, get sprayed.”

“Weird methods, but okay.”

“Then, it was withholding the sun.”

“You mean like...how do you even do that?” Sokka asks, confused. 

Zuko sighs, “There’s a number of ways. You can make people only train at night. Or cover their windows. Blindfold them. Lock them inside. Or underground. My teachers found pretty much all the ways. Once, when I was ten, there was one kick that I couldn’t get and I didn’t get to leave the caves under the palace for a week.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah, but now I have a really good high kick.”

“Yeah, I remember that one,” Sokka rubs his shoulder, reminded of how the two had first met. It stung a lot less than the last time he had remembered it. 

“Other times it would be holding ice, whenever we did something wrong. I know it really doesn’t sound bad, but for firebenders that amount of, cold, I guess... I don’t know if you’ve even been burnt but it...it feels like that. But, somehow even worse. Like, it’s going straight into your bones. We had to regulate our breathing while doing it, keeping it low and centered. It wasn’t an everyday occurance, that would be seen as cruelty. Well, it would have, at the time. It was just, you mess up a kata, then you obviously had to go back to the basics and that was the basics. That one...my fingers would totally lock up. The first time they did it I couldn’t bend for a whole day.” 

“Oof.” Zuko was offering detachment, so Sokka decided,  _ alright, he can do detachment _ . No need to escalate, isolate the guy when Zuko was offering more information about his past than he had heard from all of his time knowing him, and probably more than he’s given to anyone before. Mostly because he hadn’t talked to anyone who wasn’t Fire Nation and would already know this before now but still...

“I was also like, six, so that might have been part of it. Then, I had one, she  _ sucked _ . It wasn’t for practice, but if I talked out of turn or disrespected her she would make me hold ice cubes in my mouth until they melted. Then, I would finally learn how to ‘hold my tongue’.”

“Did it work?”

“Obviously not. Even though one time it did make my teeth chatter for three days. I couldn’t talk the whole time, which she was  _ very  _ happy about.” Zuko sighed, wistfully, “Looking back I kind of wish she had stuck around, my life would probably be very different right now.” 

Sokka decides it might not be best to dive into that can of worms while he already has another one open. 

So, he makes a bad joke to change the subject. What else. “I can’t decide if this was better than the idea of scarring children.” Actually, Sokka wasn’t even sure if that was a joke or just how he felt at this point. 

“Eh. The most extreme one was probably, I had one where the whole point was to get us accustomed to fighting in the Poles. Oh, uh, sorry, by the way.”

“No, I’m looking forward to hearing this one. Since, you didn’t seem to do great in either one.”

Zuko laughed, “Fair enough. My teachers used to try to drown me.”

Sokka choked on his spit.  _ What the fuck? What the fuck? What the actual, ever-loving FUCK? _

He returned to the moment with Zuko pounding on his back as he hacked up half a lung.  _ Acting detached might be harder than he thought _ . 

“What?!”

“Drowning someone, it’s like, you keep someone from breathing—”

“I know what drowning is! I lived on an ocean! I just don’t understand how in the name of every single god that exists  _ that _ was supposed to help you learn anything?!”

“Oh, that’s easy. They would dunk our head in ice water until we couldn’t breathe and then we would have to fight. As soon as we were able to win, we would be done with it for that day.” 

_ What. The. Fuck.  _

Calm. Sokka  _ had  _ to be calm. No use yelling at the guy when he seems to have gotten enough of that previously. “How long did it take you to do that?”

“Eh, not too long. They started off easier, I only had to do katas after getting dunked. Then longer forms. Only after that did I have to do the fighting. And they even started me with only one sparring partner, by the time they switched teachers again I had to fight eight.”

“How generous...”

“I know! The idea was that you could fall into the ice, get frozen, whatever and still be able to fight. And, I will say, even though I wasn’t able to win, I still was able to do that at least. You freeze most firebenders to a wall, they wouldn’t be able to call a flame for at least half a day.” Zuko says, smugly.

Sokka focuses on picking at the grass under his hands.  _ Detached, still detached.  _ “So, um, is that all?” He hopes, for the sake of his windpipe, that that is all. 

“Yeah pretty much, that’s the whole gist of the thing. Firebender messes up, firebender is isolated from element, firebender gets better.”

“Cool. Awesome. Super smart. Real geniuses in the Fire Nation.” Sokka breathes a sigh of relief, glad that this particular chapter of ‘will Sokka decide to storm the Fire Nation by himself, right now?’ seems to be exhausted. “Um, I’m going to try a new training technique, for this new re-training that we’re talking about, you tell me how it works out.”

“Okay,” Zuko says, just as Sokka pulls him into a bone-crushing hug. He squeezes and squeezes, even if that firey, sick feeling was back, even if Sokka feels like he can’t let him go, at least can't let him go while he still thinks that is at all normal, maybe, in the back of Sokka's way-too-sentimental-for-a-Southern-tribesman heart hoping to warm the kid up who was forced frozen way too often in his life. 

Zuko doesn’t respond at first. Until...Sokka can feel him slowly, carefully, relax, just the smallest bit. Which Sokka will always count as a win...while never mentioning how much attention he had paid to the other teen’s body. Eventually, when he feels like a suitable time has passed, Sokka pulls back, keeping his hands on Zuko’s shoulders. 

“Okay, Sokka’s patented Water Tribe Normalcy Check time. Punishing six year olds for not being perfect, especially as they learn a new skill. Not normal. Not okay.” Zuko opens his mouth to protest and Sokka  _ shhhs _ him. “Using the one major weakness of a bender that feels like torture…” Sokka raises his eyebrows, as Zuko tries to interrupt again before thinking better of it, “is basically torture. Not normal. Not okay. Doing that to children. Not normal. Not okay. Dunking students’ heads in water...until they can’t breathe...” His voice cracks in a very manly way, “I can’t believe I have to explain this. Not. Okay. Not Normal. Not Cool.”

“It was actually pretty cold.”

Sokka glares at him. “I can’t believe you exclusively wait for serious talks to be funny.” And Sokka can’t believe he actually  _ is  _ funny. “All of those things. All of them. Super not what is supposed to happen.” As Zuko averted his eyes, Sokka decides to revert back to the old technique, pulling him into another hug. Squeezing. 

This time, Zuko, still timid, still...being Zuko...carefully places his hands on Sokka’s lower back and Sokka’s heart goes back to its new home in his stomach. He adds, knowing Zuko would take it better with no one looking at him and Sokka’s face buried in his shoulder, “It is great that you came out the bender and fighter you are. But you should not have had to go through all of that to get here.” 

Zuko rests his chin on his shoulder. “Thanks Sokka.” 

Zuko pulls back and Sokka lets him go. He actually manages to make normal eye contact with him while they sit and Zuko adds, “And thank you for the...Water Tribe Check.” The firebender cracks a smile as he says, “I look forward to  _ re _ -training with you in the future, Master Sokka,” even adding an impeccable bow to complete the picture. 

“And I think you will be a wonderful student, young pupil. I look forward to our many days together.”

Zuko even almost laughs at that one, catching himself at the last second in a way Sokka registers for a later project: getting the repressed former Evil-Lord to learn how to actually laugh for once. At something other than the Fire Nations weird inside-jokes about maiming trainees. But, for now, he’s happy to sit, brushing shoulders, hoping for a few more seconds of peace before the rest of the gang finds them. 

Even so, one more thing weighs on Sokka’s mind. As the wind whistles through the canyon, he decides he has to know and hopes for the best answer. 

“Hey Zuko?”

“Hmm…”

“I know you didn’t mention… names of any of your teachers but I just wanted to ask...um...your uncle?”

Even though the way he looks at Sokka gives him all the information he needs. And eases Sokka’s mind. 

“No, he would— He would never do something like that. Honestly, he was gone for long, I don’t think he even knew what was happening at the palace before—” Zuko cuts himself off and Sokka hadn’t even thought, just immediately found his hand on the others’ knee again, thumb rubbing in circles, blood rushing in his ears, his face warm. He feels like he might pass out and decides to talk to Katara as soon as she woke up. 

But then, Zuko looks up at him, his hair falling in his eyes. The relief on his face makes it all alright. His chest eases, his skin feels freshly doused in water, his hand feels right, on the others’ skin. Sokka has never been grateful for his own bravery before, since it usually put him and his friends into life-threatening peril but this was a completely different kind of beast to conquer. Sokka knew, this conversation had unmistakably, totally been worth all of the headache and stomach churning because of the look Zuko gave him. Like...Sokka had actually fixed something, for once, instead of just alleviating it. Like...he had done more than just setting something for Katara to heal later or hold off the troops until the real warriors showed up. Like...he had helped. 

“Before I had to leave.” Zuko says, “I know, he would know the customs, rumors, whatever of how the harsher teachers worked. He told me once, when I asked if he would, when he was beginning to train me. And I uh, I had really, really messed up. He told me that was how he grew up for the most part. It took him a long time to understand it was a barbaric practice, one that isolated firebenders from their element rather than helping them. He said he would never use it on me or any other bender as long as he lived.”

“And you won’t use it on Aang?”

Zuko snorted, looking up through his hair at Sokka. Before realizing, “Oh, you’re serious.”

Sokka nods, feeling slightly petulant at missing out on another of Zuko’s jokes.. 

“Somehow I think using The Dark and Scary Cold on the waterbender who can literally freeze water and was trapped in an  _ ice _ berg for a hundred years might not be too effective.” 

Sokka laughs. When Zuko grins with him, and the sun's rays get unbearably hot for a second, Sokka thinks he might be able to wait a day before telling Katara about his mysterious ‘cold’. 

Training session one: highly successful. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for non-explicit suicidal ideation (Sokka thinks that Zuko is reckless and the type to throw himself off a cliff to avoid a difficult conversation.  
> Also, heavy child-abuse normalized as 'teaching' in this chapter. 
> 
> Thank you guys for all the really great response! This really makes me so happy :)
> 
> Feel free to drop a comment or hmu at tumblr (constellayetions)


	3. What You Don't Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW in end notes!
> 
> This chapter now has AMAZING art by [ @6y9brows ](https://6y9brows.tumblr.com/) that you can find [ here on tumblr ](https://6y9brows.tumblr.com/post/622793525596176384/the-grass-that-had-filled-the-crack-has-burnt) and [ here on twitter ](https://twitter.com/6y9brows/status/1279704890541924352) Go check it out!

Aang’s training was the following afternoon. 

Well, it was supposed to be that same afternoon but then a ‘waterbending emergency’ came up and Aang just _had_ to finish learning this one form with Katara that they had started that morning.

Honestly, Zuko didn’t know which one of them was pushing the convenient excuse.

Honestly, he didn’t care. The two of them were a synergistic combination of nerves and anxieties, both seeming to feed the other’s as soon as one settled down. 

A nervous bender was a dangerous bender. Zuko was happy to wait until they both came to terms with their sudden change in fate and a firebender coming much sooner than either expected. 

For today, Zuko could practice. Separately. 

He had a lot to think about. 

///

He started with basic forms. Then, the more advanced. Then, the most difficult ones he knew that he still struggled to stick. 

Then, he did his favorite thing to do in practice, which was experimenting. 

Well, that was what he had started calling it. He used to call it ‘fucking around’ or ‘wasting time’ or ‘pissing off everyone in the vicinity’. But now, it was experimenting. 

When he was much younger, before he had even been banished, before Lu Ten had even been sent to the Earth Kingdom, before he had any reason to pay attention to his lackluster nephew, his Uncle had visited him when he was training. 

Zuko hadn’t noticed at first. He had done what he always thought he was supposed to. He drilled all the forms he knew. He drilled the katas, the kicks, the punches, the leaps. Over and over and over and over. 

Iroh was watching the whole time. Once Zuko had noticed, he drilled even harder. He focused on putting more power into each punch, each kick, trying to become perfect and uniform, like his teachers wanted. 

After a while, Iroh interrupted him. He called him to sit down and drink tea. He asked him what he had been trying to accomplish, which had made Zuko so mad at the time. Now, he thought on it fondly, sure that his uncle had enjoyed how easy it was to rile up little Zuko. And enjoy the ten year old yelling with the strength and scariness of the kitten-bears old ladies kept as pets. 

Iroh talked to him about the importance of breath and understanding where the power of a movement came from. And left him with one last thing to think on:

“Practicing what you know puts the road of a movement into the body. Practicing what you don’t know explores the entire landscape. An arrow that can only hit a target catches little to eat.” With a wink and a whispered, “practice what you don’t know”, Iroh finished his tea and was called away to another meeting. 

Zuko antagonized over the phrase for a long time. ‘Practice what you don’t know’. He remembers being so frustrated, mad, and feeling so stupid, venomously spitting ‘what does it mean Uncle?!’ into the dirt after even longer practice sessions. 

Until finally, after his Uncle had left on another campaign, after his younger sister was at her nobility school, his cousin was training for the front lives and his mother and father were both at endless required trips and engagements with nobility, Zuko practiced what he didn’t know. 

There was a lot he didn’t know. The majority of things he didn’t know, which he was hyper-aware of. But, he had to start somewhere. 

So, he started in the garden. 

He knew his climbing skill was something Azula always was jealous of, since she always tried her best to shoot him out of any height he had found his way to rather than following. He knew how to climb a tree. He knew how to climb up to a roof. On days where he wanted validation from knowing one thing that the rest of the royal family didn’t, he would climb all the way to the top of the palace, to the small landing that no one seems to have discovered in decades that plants were now reclaiming. There it was safe. There it was calm. 

But, even up where no one could find him, he also knew the terror of being stuck in the air somewhere, with someone waiting at the bottom. Of being trapped. Of not knowing any other way to get out than down and down only had consequences.

Zuko easily climbed the tree in the garden, as he had done countless times before, reaching high enough to be out of sight in seconds. He normally kept close to the trunk, knowing the dangers of the further out branches. From here, he could see the roof of the palace. The jump between the furthest branches of the tree and the roof was only about two feet but he knew that they wouldn’t hold his weight that far out. He would have to jump.

For a second, he questioned his own intelligence for trying this, his own sanity even. What would uncle say? 

That was the wrong (right?) think to think as his mind flashed back to another proverb, another infuriating lesson from him. 

He had been learning to bend for only a few months. Uncle had asked him to show him a few moves, claiming that there was much to be learning from young minds and seeing how a fresh brain looks at a craft. He said “a new path finds more berries than the most reliable bush”. 

Zuko made to bend a little fireball, one that would die harmlessly in the air, but messed up the wrist movement, promptly sending the fireball flying...at his own face. Zuko ducked out of the way and pulled the tablecloth with him, almost shattering the tea set if it hadn’t been for the soft cushions and carpets his uncle was fond of. At the time, Zuko had burst into tears, sure he would not be forgiven for this foolishness. But his uncle had been kind instead. He said, “We learn much more from any unexpected failure than from any expected success.” Then he showed Zuko how he could use the wrist movement for attacking an enemy behind him, without even needing to turn around. He had praised Zuko for his mistake. (Zuko had even seen Iroh use the movement, even if it was just for show, on an enemy behind him during their travels).

The Zuko on the tree knew what he had to do, even if this would make for a fantastic failure. He readied himself, finding what seemed to be the strongest and longest branch. He sprinted forward, leapt, and soared through the air...directly into the wall of the palace. 

All of the air was knocked out of him and Zuko’s fingers barely grabbed onto the edge of the roof. He scrambled for any purchase until his fingers caught on the smallest lip of a loose shingle. He smiled. It took three tries for him to manage to get enough momentum to swing himself onto the roof but he did it. As he lay on the roof, panting, he finally understood. 

_Practice what you don’t know_. 

Within weeks, he was able to leap easily, tree to tree, roof to roof, finding the gaps in his abilities and working on them. Now, when Azula and her friends chased him he lost them easily, being able to jump and climb his way into a hideout they would never find. 

His training took the same way in other avenues. 

He picked up the weapons in the training room, exclusively ones he had no idea how to use, and turned them to his own advantage. His favorites were the bladed weapons, especially the dual dao, The double blades provided an inexhaustible number of possibilities while he worked.

He was more cut and bruised than ever, but also happier than he’d ever been. 

His firebending training lagged, according to his teachers. The forms they gave him always seemed to be muddled, making no sense. He remembered thinking, what purpose does this even serve? Does the enemy only have a certain number of moves that they can attack? Ones that have been the same since our own katas were created, hundreds of years ago? What earth kingdom soldier is going to wait for me to do intermediate form #5 so I can get a hit in the big flying kick in the middle?

He knew that the forms would not help him in actual combat, so he had to figure it out for himself. 

When no one watched him, he experimented. 

He tried feints, something no honorable firebending master would ever teach, but he had seen the swordsmen in their training do again and again. He tried mixing up the katas, the forms. He tried new movements, slashes and evades instead of the direct attacks his teachers liked. He even tried combining weapons and firebending, finding as many techniques as he could. 

He did this, even on his ship. 

He was ashamed to admit some of the more horrible things he discovered he could do when he was older. The worst one was one that combined knife fighting and firebending. He found that he could melt the metal after a stab, sticking it to the skin and requiring surgery to remove.

At the time, he felt guilty turning them aside to pursue more stealth, more ways of fighting without gruesome injury. He knew none of his bloodline before him would abandon the tactics he discovered, other than his uncle. He abandoned them anyway. 

Instead, he created flame daggers. He could use the same knife fighting with a weapon he would never have to hide or carry. It took work, making a flame so controlled, so close to skin, but it worked wonders in stealth and didn’t telegraph his next attack like most taught firebending forms did.

As Zuko worked, currently, he let thoughts of his former training wash over him. He hadn’t realized how much of his training had really just been him...doing what Ozai and his other teachers had dismissed as wasting time. Learning things he hid from everyone. 

When he followed the Avatar, he came to face the depth of how much he didn’t know, how inadequate he truly felt he was. 

That first night after he had been defeated at the South Pole, he replayed the fight over and over in his mind. Stretching, studying, and then replicating every movement the avatar and the waterbender had made. Some worked with fire. Some absolutely, hideously did _not_ work with fire. Some threatened to burn off his last remaining eyebrow. Or simply made sparks. One memorable move, copied from the airbender (Aang, he really should call him Aang) ended up filling his entire room with smoke, without a hint of fire. Which, while very useful, did a number on his lungs for a few days. 

The forms were incredibly clumsy but he still took to this nightly habit and. As he saw more of their styles, he became more bruised than he had in years. Almost as much as he had been when he first learned how to jump between roofs and trees. How to _properly_ practice.

Even with all the damages, he knew his bending was improving more than it ever had been. 

Zuko knew the power that came from observing other benders, replicating them, sharing their knowledge. 

But, for the life of him, he could not understand what Aang had said last night. 

He had said, the air nomads emphasize intent over control. So, if you have no ill intent, you won’t need control. 

_Great advice from a group of people that couldn’t even kill an animal for food_ , Zuko thinks. Then, immediately, feels guilty for thinking that. 

Zuko tries to think of times in his life where he had no ill intent. And fails. 

So, he tries to think of people that he feels no ill intent to. Uncle Iroh. His mother. 

Gods, he hopes that his list of people didn’t stop there. Sokka had just started his ‘normalcy check’, but Zuko could figure for himself that two people on his list of people he cared about was bad. 

No ill intent. There had to be more. People Zuko would never hurt, no matter what. Lee. The boy from the earth kingdom village. Lee’s mother. Those two that he had betrayed, been driven out of their town. Song. Who he may have not hurt physically but he knew...he still hurt her. Jin. Who he had left after one almost-kiss, not wanting to deceive another person. 

Even his mother and his uncle. He loved them, more than anything in the world, but hadn’t he still hurt them? Hadn’t his mother still had to leave, because of him? Hadn’t he still subjected his uncle to life in prison? Wouldn’t he still be safe, happy if Zuko hadn’t betrayed him? Hadn’t he forced him into treason at the North, where he shouldn’t even have been? Hadn’t he forced him, because of Uncle’s foolish sense of responsibility, to abandon his own home to come with him on his stupid banishment? His hopeless quest to find the Avatar?

“Ack—!” Zuko cries out in pain and looks down at his hand. 

Zuko had never burnt himself before. 

He hadn’t even noticed how tightly he was gripping his hands together, but there it was, a perfect thumbprint, burnt into the meaty part of his left palm. 

Firebenders were not fire-resistant, even with the higher tolerance, but...their own fire rarely burnt them. Usually stupid accidental burns were from setting something on fire and forgetting about it. Zuko had his own share of idiotic burns from being too close to a candle when he was young or setting his clothes on fire without realizing. 

But his own fire…

He examines the shape again. Definitely from him. 

He remembers what Aang said. Intent matters. If goodwill could go one way then maliciousness could go there other. 

Zuko had wanted to hurt himself. So, he did. 

He had lost control in a way he was never supposed to, a way that he had been trained never to do, hadn’t done in years. 

Except, he hadn’t lost control, had he? He had meant it. He was doing what he intended. 

Zuko thinks of all the generals, captains, soldiers who used the same excuse ‘losing control’. They weren’t doing anything they didn’t mean or didn’t intend. They wanted to hurt people. 

Zuko sits down to mediate. 

He knows that he has no idea how to do this. He never had been taught...caring about people meant good intent for them. He had been taught care means work and sacrifice on good days and retribution and punishment on bad ones. 

Good intent...good intent. Good intent. Good intent. goodintentgoodintentgoodintent— 

He opens his eyes. 

The floor of the temple was cracked from years of disuse, just like the landing in the Caldera was. It had been enough years that plants poked their way through it. Zuko looked until he found— perfect.

A buttercup sprouted from the collected soil. It was yellow, bright against the grey stone around it. None of its brethren seems to have made a home here yet. This flower being the first, brave to... 

_This is demeaning_ , shoots to Zuko’s mind. He shakes it off, he _has_ to have total faith in this to work. Aang would have no problem, probably, expounding upon a single flower’s good traits for half a day, probably. 

The flower...is a flower. 

The flower...reminds him of himself? He also struggled to survive, put in a place that didn’t want him. A place that didn’t want him to survive. He had to work to be able to find the smallest gap of space to live. He was given no resources, even though the flower was no less than twenty feet away from rich flowerbeds that lined the edge of the pavilion, teeming with overgrown wildlife. He too, had chosen a harder path, the lonelier one, and found a space to carve out for himself. 

The flower had done the same. It was just a flower but, how else would the crack come to be? Other than wildlife, slowly breaking through the stone that had lasted for decades before. They had reclaimed what once was theirs and had been taken away, by human hands, they were _survivors_.

Zuko reflects, finding actual admiration now for this...plant. This thing he would have stepped on with no remorse a week ago. 

Here goes nothing. 

He sets the ground on fire, his nervousness adding energy into the blaze, blocking his view until he steadies himself. The fire downs down, dropping to just an inch on the ground, the kind of small, long burn that others saw no use in mastering (even as they probably would be unable to). 

The grass that had filled the crack has burnt away, along with the dirt around it. But the flower sat there, surrounded by fire, completely unharmed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! This is the chapter with the accidental self-harm. Basically, Zuko burns himself while practicing and realizes that it was possible was because he held actual maliciousness towards himself. It's technically accidental in this capacity but if you want to skip it you can go from, 'his hopeless quest to find the Avatar?' to 'Zuko sits down to meditate'. 
> 
> So, a lot of this came from the idea with the leaf thing Jeong Jeong had Aang do...if they can keep things from totally burning it makes sense that they can keep things from burning at all, right? Plus, there's more than enough times that firebenders don't burn their surroundings when its their own place (like when Zuko fights Aang in his own ship) versus when they are somewhere else and their fire does burn their surroundings (like Kyoshi island, etc). So, this plays with the idea of how firebenders are able to also let things NOT burn. 
> 
> Thank you all for such the kind comments and kudos! It really means a lot <3  
> As always, feel free to [ follow me on tumblr ](https://constallayetions.tumblr.com/)


	4. No Ill Intent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko teaches Aang the new trick he learned: How to NOT burn things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW at end
> 
> If it's not clear, the first little bit is Zuko's POV and after the '///' it's Aang's

Zuko spends most of the night awake, practicing. Practicing until he was _sure_. 

He doesn’t sleep much anyway. Not here. His nights camping had been just this side of more, restless. He got less sleep there but has worse dreams here. Being a wanted traitor after betraying the only family member that doesn’t (didn't?) want to kill you really doesn’t encourage rest. 

Zuko knows today the Avatar’s firebending training _had_ to start. Now that he knows how to correct Aang’s misconceptions of firebending, he wants to avoid any more wasted time. 

While the dragons had been able to teach the two where true firebending actually came from and what it _could_ be, they had done little to tamper Aang’s fears of what it currently was. Zuko sighs. And, the fears were right. Fire was, as it was used by his nation, violent, destructive, and a means for people to live out their own fantasies of ‘greatness’. The control had past just controlling the element to controlling whatever you could with the element. Zuko had seen earth corrupt in the same way with the guards outside Li’s village though. 

_Intent. Not control._

Enough of Agni’s rays had crept over the horizon, illuminating the canyon in a warm glow. It was time to wake Aang. 

///

Aang loves mornings. Aang loves sleeping in on mornings. He loves the cold mountain air and bullfrogs singing and the colors of the morning sun and the stick in the side that was currently poking him. 

Wait, what? 

He opened his eyes, and blearily rubbed them. Then rubbed them again. And one more time just for good measure, hoping that the firebender attached to said stick was just a...speck of dirt in his eye or an eyelash or...something. 

No luck.

“Um...hi Zuko! If you want breakfast it’s just—”

“I’m not here for breakfast.”

“Well, you should be, I know that I personally can’t start a good day without a good breakfast, actually, I’m really hungry, I should probably start on that now—”

Zuko grabs his collar before he can run for the supplies on Appa and find a convenient excuse for why he needs to go gather fruit or vegetables or tree nuts or something very important right this very moment. 

“You need to come with me.”

“Oh, Zuko, I totally would but me and Toph need to work on earthbending this morning. We’re really busy.”

Zuko looks to where said earthbender is sitting. Currently snoring. Even in her sleep, she manages to perfectly kick a rock at Aang. He should have known not to use _her_ as an escape.

“I feel like she can spare you for a few hours.”

Aang gulps, running out of will and reasons to argue. Zuko gestures for him to follow. 

They make it through...a lot of the temple that Aang hadn’t realized Zuko even _knew_ about before he couldn’t take the silence anymore.

“Where are we going?” 

“A courtyard.”

“Oh, cool.”

They keep walking. 

“What are we going to do in the courtyard?”

“A demonstration.”

“Oh!” A demonstration means _Zuko_ will be the one doing things. “Sounds good Hotman!”

And they keep walking. 

“A demonstration of what?”

Here Zuko finally stops, quick enough that Aang runs directly into his back. Aang makes to apologize but Zuko whirls around too fast and Aang’s throat dries up. 

“Firebending.”

“OH!” Oh no. “Um, I dunno Zuko I kind of think we should wait another couple days, Katara and I are still working on The Stingray’s Secret and I’m almost done with it!” Aang is _such_ a good liar. “Plus, I need to work with Toph on my stance. Umm… You know, I’ve seen all of the _super_ cool moves required for firebending and I just don’t think I’m quite ready yet.”

Zuko looks at him. And continues walking. Maybe Aang wasn’t as convincing as he thought he was…What would they say in the Fire Nation? Oh...cinders...

They reach a place Zuko seems to recognize as a stopping point. 

Aang almost says something, but Zuko silences him again. 

“What do you see in this courtyard?”

“Umm…” Aang shimmies around him to see. And tries not to gasp. And fails not to gasp.

It was a courtyard, not a special one at all, not for rituals or anything other than lounging, that used to be part of the temple. It had clearly fallen into more disrepair than the part of the temple Team Avatar (Aang really loves that name) stays in. It was probably due to the lower altitude, more water buildup. But the cracks over the tiles and up the walls wasn’t what threw him. Or the uncanny cleanliness of the statue in the center of the pavilion. The entire floor seemed to be blackened, covered with soot, some drifting up the walls, most of the ash coming to sit in piles by little eddies that ran through the temple. Whatever Zuko had been doing...whatever had caused him to be doing what he was doing...Aang was worried. Even if he was happy that the kid (only slightly older than them!) seemed to want to open up about it? Which, he assumed he was? If he was showing it to Aang? 

Maybe Zuko was asking for Air Bender Wisdom Time?! Aang was _super_ good at that! And Zuko...would not _not_ benefit from looking for ways to find inner peace… 

Better put on a bright face for him either way! “I see...a lot of ash?” Aang starts, being right in that observation. Zuko had created a lot of ash. “Um...there’s also um...there’s a fountain, in the middle of the...you know!” Zuko continues staring him down with his should-be-famous glower.

Aang gulps, he wanders into the courtyard as he makes the rest of his observations. “Okay, um. We are in the middle of a courtyard in the Western Air Temple. The stone is gray, worn down from centuries of monks walking through here. There is a statue of Lungtok the Wise in the center of the courtyard, the center of a large fountain. He was the monk who created the tradition of pantsing!! As well as a lot of other stuff! The Great Chasm is next to us with the rising sun illuminating it. Plants used to grow in these...around the edge of the courtyard but...The courtyard is covered in ash, like the whole thing had been burned...except…” Oh!

Aang scrambles around to the open side of the courtyard, “Whoa...it’s completely preserved!” He looks up at Zuko, who hadn’t moved from the entrance, though his glare had dropped and he had taken to fidgeting with the edge of his sleeve. “How…” He looks around at the rest of the courtyard, still covered in ash except this one little, this one beautiful flower, kept in the middle of all this destruction. 

“What happened?”

“I did. I was...practicing.”

“But, how did you…I mean everything else is...how did you do that?”

“I can, uh, I’ll just show you. If that's okay…” Aang almost pops his jaw over how enthusiastically he nods. “You might want to stand back.”

Aang smiles and easily whirls back to the hallway they entered from. Maybe this presentation would actually be cool! Well, it was always going to be cool but maybe it would be cool and inspiring and not cool and terrifying. 

Zuko backs up, to the end of the crack the flower sprouts from. And then, he lets a burst of flame pour out from his open palm in a way Aang had never seen used in firebending. He had only seen fire held, tightly restrained, or coming out of sharp and precise punches and kicks. It had always seemed so controlled but this seemed like a motion Katara would teach him, not Zuko. The fire spreads from where he stands until it seems to take up almost all the courtyard, even if it doesn’t come anywhere near Aang and Zuko. He still flinches, even if he didn’t mean to, but Zuko surely couldn’t see him. Or notice. He was busy. 

Zuko draws a deep breath, and exhales, sharply and the flames respond immediately, punching down and Aang can see what still stood, in the midst of all the flames. 

He expected Zuko to have carved out a circle in the middle of the fire. He expected it to be just a tactic of intimidation, a show, the type of flare firebenders always seemed to love. A demonstration of how much control Zuko had. 

Since the other night, Aang had realized what that meant to Zuko and seems to mean to all firebenders. Control was important. It was just...a type of control that Aang...just didn’t think he could have. Ever. 

But, the flower just sat there in the middle of it. Surrounded by flames and not burning. 

“I was thinking about what you said. A few nights ago. When we were talking about control.” Aang’s confusion starts to rise, along with questions, and Zuko continues. “You said that, with the Air Nomads, you never hurt anyone, even without working so hard to control it, because you had good intent towards them, or wouldn’t want to hurt them, or, uh, I’m paraphrasing. So, I tried it. And it works, you can keep a fire without wanting to hurt something. And it won’t be hurt.”

Zuko had tried the Air Nomad style. Not just that, Zuko had _listened_. To him. The Avatar. The Air Nomad. And had tried something, from the Air Nomads. From _Aang_. And it _worked_.

“And I knew it wouldn’t be, I mean, it’s cool to not burn a flower or something but it’s not the same as people so, I, uh, well, I’ll just show you the um...yeah.”

The flames swelled up again, at the height of their knees. As Aang’s breath caught, Zuko turns towards him. And steps backward. 

Aang takes an involuntary step to stop him but Zuko just continues back until he stands next to where the flower now hid amidst all the flames. Aang knew he should run to get Katara or blow out the fire or do _anything_ to not lose the last teacher he needed, probably the only firebending teacher he was going to ever get. 

But, the thing that stopped him was Zuko didn’t seem bothered. Maybe he was just used to fire and burning. He had to, probably, since he had gotten the— well, Aang wasn’t going to think that. 

Except, Zuko didn’t seem to be hurt either. Even though he was standing in the fire and... Aang could feel his mouth dropping open. It wasn’t next to him, it was touching him! Somehow, Zuko stood there, with flames licking up his legs, his feet and nothing burned! Not even his clothes! Aang splutters as Zuko begins talking.

“I just wanted to show you this. That...fire doesn’t have to hurt you, if you don’t let it. It won’t hurt anything that you don’t, truly _mean_ to hurt. It was hard for me to understand. I actually discovered it by, ah, um, burning myself.” Whether he was Zuko’s friend or not yet it wasn’t...it didn’t feel good to hear that. It felt awful, actually. “And it took a long time, for me to truly get all of the hatred and fear out of my system to be able to do this,” he gestures at everything around him, “So, I think, with all the good in you, I think you’ll be great at it. I think you’re someone Agni would be happy to see use his gift for good.”

Zuko seems almost afraid to look at Aang by this point, afraid to see the reaction. But...Aang couldn’t help but feel his heart swell with pride. His people, his values had done this. For Zuko. For...he was sure by now, for his friend (or soon-to-be friend! Aang would make sure of it!). Even with all the poison that had been taught to him about himself, he could stand in the middle of a force he thought could only hurt and _not_ injure himself. Not wish any ill intent towards himself. 

That wasn’t enough for Aang though. Aang wasn’t afraid of hurting himself. He was afraid of hurting people. Anyone. Everyone. 

He needed one more answer and if it could work for Zuko then he would be sure. 

Before Zuko can stop him, he steps into the fire. 

He doesn’t burn. 

Aang looks up and sees Zuko, who looks just as shocked, and breaks into a huge grin. In terms of risks Aang usually takes, that was a slightly large one. Within moments, he runs through the fire and throws himself at Zuko hard enough to land them both on the flame-covered ground. And Zuko lets him.

Zuko, who had been raised to be a weapon for an empire. Zuko, whose people, whose direct ancestors had wiped out his own. Zuko who had imprisoned him, kidnapped him, hurt him and his friends. Zuko, who had been raised for seventeen years to hate him. Who would still, even with all the darkness that had surrounded his past, wish absolutely no harm towards Aang. 

Aang didn’t notice how hard he was squeezing until he felt Zuko give a small, polite wheeze. 

Before Zuko could make any decision, Aang pulls back, still smiling. Zuko had let the flames peter out, but whatever impact was there to be made had made itself by now. 

"How did...How did you know you wouldn't burn?"

"I didn't. I just hoped I wouldn't."

Zuko shakes his head and actually laughs at that.

Aang blows himself to standing and he bows, with the fire nation tradition, deep enough to befit a member of the royal family, towards Zuko. 

“Thank you, Master Zuko. I would be honored to learn firebending from you.”

Zuko stares at him for a second. But, the...whatever had caused his widened eyes relaxed into a sheepish smile. Then, he bows as well.

“It will be an honor teaching you. Now, if we want to get started, we should begin with fifty spark-ups. And I want to see those knees _high_!” Even as Aang groans, he can feel the grin under it. Zuko doesn't even hide his own, both overcome by whatever feeling of...trust. Surprisingly, it was trust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for mentions of self-harm (a reference to the burn Zuko gave himself last chapter)
> 
> Thank you all for such encouraging responses! Aang was so fun to write!   
> We've got one more in this lil section but I've already got the first chapter of the next part of Culture Shock written :). Hopefully they'll be both be up within the next week...
> 
> Thank you all again and I hope you all have a blessed day. <3


	5. Two Steps Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Step Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW at end  
> Just so y'all know this chap is p heavy Zukka, if you don't like, just pick up on our regularly scheduled programming in the next part of the series, i'll put a summary in the end notes

Aang had left for the day. Mornings were now saved for firebending practice, with the late afternoons and evenings going to other elements. And whatever other trouble the kid, along with the other powered-up children could get into. 

Zuko sat in his pavilion. He let a flame quickly run over his hand, jumping from one to the other. He had been getting better at not letting his fire burn anything. Also, noting the irony since most firebending training focused on the opposite. 

Zuko was...shocked by many things. Not the Avatar’s skill, he knew that was going to be a given. He’s a talented kid. But, Aang was extremely...not used to firebending training. Still, extremely talented. He also was...not nicer, but nicer to _Zuko_ than the exile expected. 

Zuko was most shocked by how Aang had accepted him. How he had given him the title of master and a bow befitting a prince in the same breath. Without a single hesitation. He wasn’t sure if it was flattery or naivety or merely Aang’s ignorance of the fact Zuko was deserving of neither.

He never had given Team Avatar the Fire Nation Current Royalty/Criminal Status (revoked and full criminal) update. 

He sighs. All of that is no use to think about right now. He lets the flame dance across his arms, around his chest, down his legs and back up to circle his neck, warming the shiver that had overtaken him. The fire moves along his skin instead of the usual form of resting it a couple inches above the skin, so as to not burn yourself. 

Zuko wouldn’t burn himself. 

It was a nice reminder, especially during meditation. He would know when he was getting too negative, too ashamed because it would burn him. Great way of re-training himself. He hopes that Sokka would be proud of his progress. That he would see it as progress. Even if it severely limited any subject he was able to think about while practicing. 

Azula, no. His former training, no. His father, no. His un—, that one was close, he thinks as the hair at his nape singes. He should already know that would be a no. Best to move on now. 

This strange group he had found his way into was fine. The fire cools on his neck and warmth relaxes the muscles that had seized. The future was fine as well. Even if his breath catches and he feels like a shirshu was sitting on his chest, he didn’t sport any scars because of it. Which meant it was fine. 

He rises, finishing a final form, and lets the fire sit across his shoulders and sighs— 

Before immediately getting tackled into the fountain. 

“What the—” Zuko splutters as a blue-clad, equally soaked boy says,

“What the _FUDGE_ were you doing?!”

“What was I doing— What were you doing!?”

“Keeping you from making yourself into fire-jerky, jerk! That’s what I was doing!”

Zuko stares at Sokka. Sokka stares right back. 

They both still sat inside of the fountain. And, Sokka still sat, unfortunately, directly on top of Zuko. While they were in the fountain.

“Take off your shirt.”

“What?”

“Take. Off. Your. Shirt.”

“Sokka, why do…”

“You can take it off now, or I can drag you upstairs and have Katara do it.”

Oof, Zuko didn’t want to risk that one. 

“Well, you’ll have to get off of me first.”

“Oh. Right.” 

Sokka’s face was now entirely pink. Zuko thinks he probably was cooling down from how angry he had just been. 

“Am I allowed to get out of the fountain as well?”

“I guess. _But_ , I will not hesitate to shove you back in there if you…” he makes some gestures that Zuko thinks is suppose to be...fire? Or maybe it’s the concept of being a jerk? Or maybe if he...leaves? “Got it?”

Zuko didn’t but nods anyway. He climbs out and gives a hand to Sokka that seemed to...not be getting the cue to get out of the fountain. Or to grab Zuko’s hand. Whatever, Zuko grabs him by the collar and hauls him out anyway.

As soon as the offending shirt was off, Sokka turns him around and examines his back, ignoring his protests. He lightly ran his hand over Zuko’s skin, poking _not lightly_ at random parts and going, 

“That hurt?”

“No…” Zuko muttered every single time he asked. That is, until Sokka jams at the soft spot directly under his shoulder blade and Zuko’s entire body flinches.

“Yes, that hurt!”

“Good, just making sure you weren’t trying to lie,” Sokka grins. Then, goes quiet.

His fingers travel further up Zuko's spine, now lightly pressing at and easing tension Zuko didn't even know he had at the base of his skull. They search for...something. Who knows what he thought he would find as...oh...

Sokka's thumb traces a small arc over the nape of his neck. Over the slightly burnt hair he had found there. Suddenly, Zuko felt very cold again. Like he could feel ever bit of his skin turning into duckgoose-bumps, the icy water on his skin meeting the cold mountain air. 

He suppresses a shiver and Sokka's thumb stays on his neck. 

“So, uh, what on earth encouraged you to practice dangerous fire bending forms by yourself? Especially by _setting yourself on fire_?”

“Um...I always practice alone?”

Sokka’s entire body did a double-take. “You what!? Always!?” At Zuko’s nod, he sighs, and finally lets Zuko turn around. Well, didn’t really let him. More like, aggressively spun him but... anyway. “You got lucky this time. Don’t ever do that again! You can…” Sokka stops himself. “You can get one of us. Hey, I’m more than happy to come down here and watch you do your flame nonsense. But you, going off and training by yourself until you get hurt until one day you inevitably get _badly_ hurt...water tribe check time. Not normal, not okay. That's not how...in the water tribe, it's not just you...never mind. The point is, you can— should, at least, _try_ to trust us. Or, well, me at least. At probably Toph. And Aang won’t do anything to anybody…Actually, just get me to come watch your flame magic. You shouldn’t have to practice by yourself. I really..." he laughs, with wide eyes, "I really have no idea how that didn’t burn you. At all. So, guess someone in the other world is looking out for you, buddy.”

Sokka starts pulling him back to the camp, even as he continued checking him over. Sokka insists that it was time to go back anyway, it was dusk, _obviously_ Zuko was getting tired ], and apparently tonight was The Duke’s quarter birth-day. Though, Zuko thinks Sokka made the last one up. Like this, he seems like Katara and maybe Toph in his dedication, even if he was respectively less motherly and less murder-y than the other two. He fusses over the rest of his body, less so, but still looking for any hidden damage that would develop gangrene in the night. 

As Sokka continues to expunge on the ridiculousness of him “literally setting himself on fire, even I know that’s bad firebending! What were you trying to test? Your still not-impenetrable skin to see if your god granted you komono-rhino genetics yet?” Zuko feels somewhat of a need to comfort the other boy. Even if it was misled, the concern was...well, it felt like…like something. Who knows what. 

Zuko put on his best almost-smile. “I’m used to it. I’ll let you all know if I get into any real trouble. I wouldn’t leave you all to deal with Azula alo—”

Sokka chokes, grabbing the hand Zuko put up to fend him off. “That’s not the issue! That is not the issue here! I meant—” he stops walking and Zuko’s still gripped hand pulls him back with him. 

Apparently Sokka underestimates his own strength as it ends up with both of them tripping over each others’ feet and Zuko basically catching himself on Sokka’s forearms. And Zuko looks up into Sokka’s eyes and...oh...

Sokka looks at him with a look that...Zuko couldn’t place. Not resembling anything from Azula, from his father, even from his uncle. Not from Katara’s glares or Toph’s wide eyes with a chilling grins or Aang’s relaxed smile. It was...still nice in a way that both made Zuko’s stomach get the chilly feeling of imminent danger and warmth dance down his spine like he was still soaking up the sun. 

Zuko looks away before it could change anything worse else and Sokka starts talking. “Look, I know we’ve only had you a part of the group for a couple days. But, you’re a part of us now.” Zuko feels his hand turned over and Sokka starts rubbing that same arc into his wrist, right on his pulse point, “And, like it or not, that means that we are going to care about you. That’s part of the rules! Not as a teacher, or as a negotiation card, or as a bargaining chip, or _La_ forbid, as a _weapon_. As a person. Who is a part of us. Who we take care of, okay? We…”

Zuko looks up when Sokka unexpectedly trails off.

And looks at the sick look the other boy had on his face. And Sokka’s gaze, locked onto his hand. And at Zuko’s arm that was currently latched onto. At Zuko’s palm. And, most likely, the thumbprint, burnt into it. 

He holds it for a second, then rubs his own thumb over it and Zuko, well-learned, makes no noise when it stings. 

Sokka’s voice sounds wounded. “Is this from you?” 

“It was just—” 

Sokka sighs. 

He turns his back before Zuko can even explain. It was just an accident. It was _just_ an accident. Sokka keeps walking and Zuko knows better than to try to fix anything now. 

Well, it had been nice while it lasted. He wonders if it would be out of line to ask Sokka if it was normal that he knew it would end up like this. If it was normal that this always happens. If it was normal for Sokka to act like this. But, Zuko keeps his mouth shut, sure that all the nice words the other boy had said were now expired. 

The two make the entire way back to the camp in silence. 

That next day, when Zuko tries to practice again, he can’t stop burning himself. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: mentions of self-harm (same burn that Zuko does in chap 3, Sokka thinks it's on purpose, then bc of events in chapter, Zuko can't stop burning himself again at the end) Also, to make it clear, Sokka isn't mad at or judging Zuko for perceived self-harm or anything but bc of world building/culture things we will learn more about in the next section of the series! 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! This chapter is more of a set-up for the things to happen in the next part of the series but thank you all for so much positive response to this section of the work! I'm super excited to share the rest with you all :)
> 
> Summary if you didn't read: Sokka walks in on Zuko practicing, with the fire where it looks like it's actively burning him. Sokka tackles him into a fountain and then is very concerned and tells Zuko that he shouldn't practice alone because it's dangerous and they all care about him. Zuko tells him it's not an issue because Aang's bending is fine. Sokka is going to correct him but then sees the burn mark from the other day and asks Zuko is he burnt himself. Zuko says yes so Sokka stops talking to him and when Zuko tries to practice firebending without burning himself again he can't.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work that I've published so thank you all for reading! Looking forward to more explorations of how the kids might hit some culture shock or misunderstandings. :) Totally open to suggestions too!
> 
> Thank you all so much for joining me on this and all the amazing support you've given me! It's been an absolutely crazy response! I've gotten a lot more ideas for the rest of this series and other works and I look forward to getting to post them soon :)
> 
> Also, [follow me on Tumblr if ya want!](https://constallayetions.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Work Inspired By This:  
> Amazing Art on [ tumblr ](https://6y9brows.tumblr.com/post/622793525596176384/the-grass-that-had-filled-the-crack-has-burnt) or [ twitter ](https://twitter.com/6y9brows/status/1279704890541924352) by [ @6y9brows ](https://6y9brows.tumblr.com/)


End file.
